Regret

There is a pit
with deeds and thoughts and regrets.
It's a magic movable hole that follows me around and tempts me
with its shiny blackness.

It scares me;
yet at the same time I am
in thrall to the dark, to the ease of falling in and becoming numb
in its embrace.

The daily choice
to resist the dark is not
clear and obvious as I once believed. Black dances and masquerades
as sparkling blue.

I believe;
yet I yearn to live
as a citizen of both worlds; living in the light and flirting with
the darkness.

Who will save me
from this body of death
when death smiles like life and opens its arms to me? I believe -
help my unbelief!

There is a pit
with deeds and thoughts and regrets.
It follows me around and tempts me but I know the Light is here
with a ladder.