Just litter, kids. It's safer.

About three weeks ago a self-entitled, rich cow woman who occasionally parks in my work car park backed into my car and totally crumpled my right front fender. She had the hide to look down from her BMW at my little Corolla and ask, "Which bit did I do?" was at fault so her insurance covered it, but it's still been horribly inconvenient to be without a car for nine days, not to mention expensive to travel on public transport (yes, even with current petrol prices). Needless to say I was delighted today to hear that my car was finally ready to be picked up. I had to use my insurer's repairer, which is in Port Melbourne. Tricky in peak hour but hey... getting my car back!

Picking up my car required leaving work early, dashing down to the station to get a train into the city, pounding up the road to the bus stop only to find I'd missed the connecting bus and had to wait 25 minutes, a 9 minute bus ride after the 25 minute wait, and then a 5 minute walk down the road to the repairer. All up, one and a half hours. It was all going fairly well and by the time I got to the bus ride part I was congratulating myself on the fact that I'd make it to the repairer 10 minutes before closing time... AND on the fact that I'd found the right bus and knew where to disembark, being in an area unfamiliar to me. A few minutes later I saw my stop approaching and pressed the "please, Mr Bus Driver, let me off at the next stop" button. So far, so good. Mr Bus Driver, however, having only two passengers on board and a good run on the road, had been in The Zone and travelling a leetle too fast, so he hit the brakes with rather more force than usual. This caused my bag, which was on the floor, to tip over, whereupon my apple fell out and skidded to the front of the bus. The bus doors opened... that is, one of the bus doors opened. The other door stuck because there was an apple jammed under it.

I'm pretty civic minded. I don't litter; when I have gum I throw it in the bin; I sort my recycling; I give up my bus seat to those who look like they need it more than me. So, naturally, although I now had no intention of eating that apple I bent down to pull it out from under the partially opened door. Just as I did that the door became unstuck on its own and smacked me in the head. HARD. Really hard - there was an audible 'thwack'.

I staggered off the bus (leaving the apple behind) and proceeded towards my destination, mindful that I had only ten minutes to get to the repairer. Two minutes down the road I thought, "Boy, my head hurts." Yeah, well that would be because I'm now sporting a large red-and-purple lump at my hairline. Owwww. And of course ten minutes later I was stuck in peak hour with a throbbing head and a growing realisation that I might actually have concussion. I wouldn't say I'm one to panic, but I did spend part of the trip home reminding myself of the day, the date, the current Prime Minister, and how to count backwards from 100 by sevens. Also checked my pupils when I got home (contracting and dilating nicely, thank you). I was fine.

Next time, though, I'll leave the darn apple right where it lands.
.

9 comments:

Swift Jan said...

Sounds like a horror week! I am sorry that you got thwacked in the head!! That must have hurt like crazy! I hope the bus driver appologised, although it would surprise me greatly if he did!

Femina said...

Well, it wasn't really the bus driver's fault, and I jumped off the bus immediately after the door smacked me so he didn't have a chance. I was a little dazed! :)

dr maya vale said...

Bugger. None of that sounded very good. Here's to your not having a concussion! (Raises his decaf mocha.)

Could you email me please? I've tried two email addresses I have for you and neither one works...

Long dark hair, blue eyes said...

Your post had me in stitches!

I am so pleased that you can make fun of the situation so soon afterward.

My favorite is counting backwards from 100 in 7s...lol!

Givinya De Elba said...

Oh that sounds rotten! I'm sorry all that happened to you, right from the self-important bag who said, "Which bit did I do?" (where does she GET OFF?!) and ending with reminding yourself about the current Prime Minister and counting backwards by sevens.

I am glad, so glad, that after all that, the repairer hadn't decided to shut his doors 10 minutes early. I hate it when businesses do that.

Femina said...

I hadn't thought about the possibility of the repairer closing early! That would have been a nightmare (although good blog-fodder).

I left out the bit where I felt the lump on my head and thought, "This really needs ice" and then decided that my gloveless, Melbourne-winter frozen hands would probably do the job quite nicely. Yeah, just get that mental picture of me charging along a busy road with my fingers pressed against a rapidly swelling lump on my head...

The lump has gone down now but the bruise remains and it still hurts. (100... 93... 86...79...72...)

Crazy Sister said...

Counting backwards in sevens? You're doing well! I must try that. I have trouble with the alphabet backwards, but maybe numbers are easier...

Joce said...

Oh my dear... I'll be giggling about this one for AGES! The backwards by sevens is in the mental test exam I give numerous times every week!
Oh and if you had shock and it still hurts... definately concussion & I wouldn't have let you drive your car home... lucky it wasn't me returning you to your car, but rather giggling at your story. You've made my day! <><

Hippomanic Jen said...

Glad you made it.

Copyright © 2008 - cassa verba - is proudly powered by Blogger
Smashing Magazine - Design Disease - Blog and Web - Dilectio Blogger Template